Dark Night of the Soul and Beyond…

Felt to share some deeper perspectives as Experienced through MANY of my own “dark nights of the soul” along my journey years ago, as I remember very well how big and “crazy” and intense it can all feel when it opens up. Also sharing that humanity is now being pushed COLLECTIVELY through the “dark night of the soul” process to further the Mass Collective Awakening, each experiencing it all in their own unique ways as required…

So I’m feeling to shed some beautiful Light and deeper perspectives to what can seem very heavy, intense and perceived as “dark”, feeling like our INNER world is collapsing in us, and it truly is, but not to take us down and give up, but rather to EMPOWER us so we can make BIG POWERFUL SHIFTS and ASCEND OURSELVES OUT OF IT ALL.

We can also perceive the outer world as getting “worse” too right now through this process yet it’s not at all, it’s all just truly revealing itself and the old corrupted world of separation is crumbling in on itself as it needs to along with our inner worlds pushing us all much Deeper into our Powerful Awakening and Ascension processes, so we can all eventually create a New Beautiful World, “New Earth” from WITHIN, because it’s time for Collective Humanity to now COME HOME.

As I view humanity through the quantum field I’m seeing and feeling A LOT of Big Deep emotions flying, a lot of anger and rage, old patterns are surfacing, lots of triggers, suppressed old stories and victim mentalities surfacing, a lot of fear coming up, many getting angry and very upset at the outside world, beliefs being challenged, deep old traumas and painful memories resurfacing, lots of blaming and shaming and judging, many feeling crazy and like they have a “mental issue” or a new “mental disorder” and so much more…

Many have been avoiding the much deeper processes for years staying fixed in the 3/4D illusion of separation for many reasons, and many just don’t want to see and feel themselves on a much deeper level and truly do the deeper inner work required, so everyone is now being pushed and forced into it all as a gift so the Mass Collective Awakening can keep moving forward wether anyone likes it or not…. Its truly not a choice anymore, nobody gets to keep avoiding Awakening and/or the deeper Ascension processes anymore.

It’s GO TIME and it’s time to END THE ILLUSION for everyone, the outer world (old corrupted world) is collapsing/revealing itself as our inner worlds are collapsing as meant to to push us all to create a New World from WITHIN each one of us, and many are confused with it which is why I’m sharing this, to bring some Higher Perspectives and Understanding into view to expand upon in times when many are feeling “everything is crashing in on them”. Because truly this is only going to keep escalating and pushing forward or humanity will just keep running, hiding and avoiding never going into the much deeper and more intense processes and phases, and the world would never change… yet this Collective shift CANNOT be stopped, it’s time for us all to come HOME.

The crazy part is the dark night of the soul comes out of what seems like “nowhere”… it hits so hard and pushes us to the floor, ripping us to the core… pulling up all kinds of darkness, disparity, self worth stories, explosive emotions, past memories, traumas, victim stories, judgement, blame, fears, guilt, limiting beliefs, unconscious choices, actions and experiences held within ourselves showing us who we are and who we have been from a new view by pulling away the ability to AVOID and BLOCK it, which is the density that we’ve stuffed down and avoided or purposefully ignored or forgot even happened through our entire life, yet not at all coming out of nowhere.

As I finally realized after many… it’s  is all VERY orchestrated by our Higher Selves, Universe, Soul at the EXACT moment we require to go through it because ITS TIME… which is a big piece to remember when it comes or we can go into being victim to it pretending it “shouldn’t be happening” and why me or “somethings wrong” with us, which can slow down the process making it more uncomfortable until we allow it to be what it is, remembering it’s all happening as it should be.

Yet in the moment it comes on it feels like a crazy storm of “what the heck did I do to deserve this, why is all my past coming up, why am I seeing so many fears, judgments, shame, guilt, anger, betrayal, emotions… why do I feel like I’m reliving it all..”

And “why won’t it go away…”. Which is all a very normal part of it all or at least was for me and others I work with because it’s so heavy and big and confronting, but then we quickly realize it’s a bigger process because we are usually aware enough in our journey at the time to feel this from within. Then having to see and feel all these crazy buried moments, stories, experiences until we realize in some way it all has to be at least looked at, acknowledged or it just won’t go away.

Which is the actual point of it all…!

We are literally being faced with ourselves on a level never felt before to really show us that we hold all this inside and it now needs to be acknowledged, resolved and Taken Responsibility for over time in order for us to keep raising our frequency and our vibration, moving forward in our journey. We are getting a very close up and detailed glimpse of ourselves, the density, ego separation and un resolved energy we’ve held within ourselves very much on purpose through the conditioning and programming to not deal with things in the moment, “stuff everything down and it all goes away” mentality, which unknowingly to many means it’s all going to come up later in our lives as a big part of later phases of Awakening into our intentional Ascension process.

Yet the BIGGER piece usually missed the first, second dark night of the soul or don’t understand is that this is all the density, karmic loops, ego fragments that now must be consciously Resolved over the next months and years to get to the next level or phase of our journey.

But humanity hasn’t been taught how this works, meaning how in later phases of Awakening and into Ascension it’s all 100% our responsibility to intentionally clear out and Take Responsibility fir the energetic weight, unconscious baggage we’ve been carrying…  so we just do our best to get though the process the first or second time and at some point stop fighting it and allow it all to be seen and acknowledged as thats the only way it seems to make it all dissipate…, Usually finding some way to honour, love who we’ve been or what we allowed. Which does help shift things and gain new perspectives, opening up new pieces of our process as It all comes in layers and we are always growing through it all on some level.

First dark night of the soul can either push us into a massive internal shift or we can get stuck for a while until we allow ourselves to feel the true bigger picture and then act upon it. 2nd and 3rd time and beyond… knock, push, force us hard into the bigger process and just won’t stop until we give in and begin to actually do something bigger and more conscious about it all, which becomes all new processes, not just surface processes and coping anymore. This is when we are pulled deep inside to see how we actually created and magnetized everything to ourselves in life and that we are truly responsible for absolutely EVERYTHIJG buried within our energy body. We all handle seeing ourselves a bit differently so the process becomes unique for each of us in how we accept or push away trying to avoid it all again, and how long it lasts.

That being said I know it’s not easy or fun to see ourselves, I know it was beyond challenging the second time way back in 2015 even though I was doing ayahuasca regularly purposefully wanting to see myself. Yet still tough when this all came in like a ton of bricks feeling like it was all “crashing in on me”, and it was but was happening very much for me, not to me and I felt this deep down, I just had to keep allowing and reminding myself it was happening for me.

I found myself finally calming down and allowing myself to see myself and saying to myself “I’ve got this, it’s all just pieces of me, I’m just being shown who I was and am, it’s ok, I see you”… then trying to love myself for it all and honour it all which truly helped a lot as this was a big part of why it was all coming up, was to honour it all as things I’d said, done, ran from, created, allowed, avoided…

Once it began to not be so intense after days and the intensity of it all finally pulling away I was able to really sit with myself. I was able to really take in that I wasn’t the best person to myself or others… actually really “shitty” to myself and others at times and it was a bit tough to sit with for a while, but that was the actual point of It all, to actually see, feel ourselves for who we are on a level never felt before because we purposefully buried and avoided it all our entire lives every time a piece came up in our heads. Because that’s  what humans were programmed to do when our past comes up in our heads, we avoid, push away, run or “self medicate” to forget.

So our Higher Self comes in and decides its now time for us to see and feel it all, because its now time to come further into our journey. Which an Awakening in later phases transitioning into Ascension is truly ALL about resolving and Taking full Responsibility for ALL OF OUR DENSITY, UNCONSCIOUS CREATIONS.. which I will now share from experience is actually all created from our ego, separation programming and allowing our ego, lower mind (they are one with different Functions) to unknowingly control our lives since childhood.

Ego being the embodiment of separation in itself with many fragments unknown or shared with the masses very much on purpose as I will share below, until realized after many dark nights of the soul/ego”which ends up becoming a bigger point of the “dark night” processes, to eventually see it’s all been created through taking on and allowing our ego/lower mind to run and control our lives based from separation and being programmed, conditioned to believe how “life works” being born into an already manipulated world where all information is given upside down, twisted and backwards to stop humans from Awakening.

Which is a deep subject to open up for those unaware… but again that’s another point of the “dark night” processes. That’s why some call it “the illusion” or “matrix”, it’s a manipulated reality built from ego and separation to keep us controlled and locked in a prison state, lost in our own inner prisons of the mind judging, blaming, shaming, guilting ourselves and others living in fear of the outside world and our own selves missing the bigger more beautiful understanding of life and that we actually live in a quantum reality, that if we were guided to remember the actual Truth of our reality and how it really works through universal Consciousness (which is much more awesome than I could have ever imagined) and the real reason we are actually alive here now we would be living life much differently, not feeding the ego system of separation based off fear and control. We wouldn’t be a “sick” and broken society, we would be absolutely FLOURISHING, all very happy, healthy and fulfilled living in the present moment as we are meant to.

Ego becomes a much more vast topic along the journey as it starts as one thing we were “taught”, conditioned to believe it is then eventually blows WIDE OPEN into something sooooo much BIGGER DEEPER more EXPANSIVE as I will share below through my own process of Ascending my consciousness out of the 3/4D ego based reality, world.

I’m sharing to open up a much bigger perspective to Activate the REMEMBERING within your own DNA, sharing all levels of dark night of the soul/ego as I experienced it as it was nothing like I had ever felt it would be and took a while to truly come through and Embody all through Activating the Remembering within my own DNA and eventually through merging with my Higher Self and then Embodying QUANTUM, UNIVERSAL, SOURCE CONSCIOUSNESS by coming through my own Ascension process.    

Before I get to far I do want to point out that I’m not saying the ego is “evil” or “bad”, I’m sharing from my own journey and Soul Embodiment  that it is a”program”, it’s entire function is separation and nothing else and that we are meant to transcend OUT of the lower mind ego control based reality back to our intended state of FULL CONSCIOUSNESS.. we purposefully chose to be born into “Earth School”to drop our consciousness then Ascend back out of it, which many call “the fall of consciousness”..

After a few dark nights of the ego I began to deeply work on myself in ways that didn’t conform to regular spiritual practices, I received guidance from WITHIN through my DNA, REMEMBERING that we are meant to Resolve and Take Responsibility for all of our UNconscious choices, actions, thoughts, reactions, beliefs and especially our ego matrix which was responsible for the density I, we all held. Seeing and feeling deeply that we magnetized ALL, every single experience into our lives very purposefully but I didn’t yet understand how that worked at this point of awareness, just resonated from sooooo deep within.

Then started seeing and feeling the ego through many ups and downs, expansions, contractions that ego was the separation we all held and had many fragments like fear, anger, the shame, judgment, blame of self and others, victim mentalities, lack, my identity and identities, hate, anger, guilt of myself and others, control, better than, betrayal with myself and others and manipulation, addiction to material life and living from convenience… just to name a few.

This is when I started calling it dark night of the ego and then eventually because I was looping in it all on repeat just started working on Resolving and Taking Responsibility for actually taking in all these traits, fragments, choices and allowing it all to consume and control my reality my entire life since childhood, eventually seeing, feeling it all came through unknowingly excepting the programming, conditioning, manipulation and indoctrination fed from the outside world as truth of how life works, unknowingly coming from school, parents, grand parents books, movies, history which is where my identities formed as well, which were part of the ego too. Because  this illusion has been going on for many many many cycles, so we have been being born into the manipulation/illusion/3D matrix of separation cycle after cycle, which is how we accumulated “karmic debt”, which is part of the density we hold and are resolving but that’s another post in itself.

This was all a big shift and nothing like anything that anyone else was seeing or doing around me or anywhere I could find on the internet at the time, I was all on my own for a while as meant to be to fully experience this and keep trusting from WITHIN and now very intentionally doing the deep inner work to resolve, Take Responsibility for EVERYTHING I’d ever taken in and on from the outside world since birth.  And that’s when I STOPPED having dark knights of the ego. Because I had taken control and was now very intentionally doing the deeper inner work daily, all day everyday for years to fully Resolve and Dissolve the ego control and the density created and attached to it being the control mechanism of how I viewed life.

I did this for a few years non stop, being tested, slammed to the floor into all my density but wouldn’t let any of take me back down which is what the ego tries to do even after resolving and taking responsibility for all the density, because that’s all it knows it to recycle the old, and our Higher Selves just keep squeezing and testing until we never ever fall back into it all again, working day in day out, was ALL IN on my process, completely shut out the outside world, no material, no convenience and fully living in the present moment.

Nobody around me wanted to understand, many felt I was totally crazy but I just kept on going KNOWING and FEELING from DEEP WITHIN that this was the way…

Which I’m so glad I did because this was GAME CHANGER and became beyond freeing inside. It didn’t matter what anyone else thought, I know, knew with ALL MY HEART on the HIGHEST LEVEL that it was my path. It was when I really became a whole new being from the inside out, MASSIVE energetic weight which was the density I held was now gone…  that’s when my mind literally SHUT OFF… no more thinking, no more looping, no more incessant chitter chatter, just BLANK… this went on for what seemed like weeks, was soooo awesome and peaceful, quiet, yet sooo very weird at the same time as I didn’t know what to do or what was happening. This is when all information, understandings, knowledge, guidance and knowing all began to stream from within straight out my mouth. Thinking was no longer an option as it was part of lower mind/ego matrix as I would realize a bit down the road. No more asking the mind for information as it felt so off, no more regurgitating what I “thought” I knew, then realizing the mind is basically a “storage facility” for all information taken in/on in the 3/4D illusion and all filtered through the ego fragments of separation which we are meant to transcend. The next piece to take in was that I had Activated my Higher Mind that now worked through my Higher Heart which is the portal to Quantum Consciousness.

At this point I was divinely guided to a powerful soul that had already ascended and was guided to read a post that explained my experience, process of reaching “zero point presence”.., I was calling it “zero space” which was actually Ascending my Consciousness, the end of the lower mind ego illusion.  WOW… which was my ego Release process or what many refer to as “ego death”… but energy cannot die so it’s just not at all in control anymore because after years and years of deep inner work purposefully looking within for any fragments, stories, experiences, density to resolve by taking FULL responsibility for ALL of its creation and being tested over and over and over, we FINALLY take control BACK from the ego we so unknowingly took on and that’s the big beginning of how we REMEMBER our TRUE POWER from WITHIN. That we are FAR MORE POWERFUL than the lower mind ego illusion of manipulation and that’s what a True Awakening is that leads into Ascending ourselves out of the 3/4D ego illusion, and that’s the biggest reason for dark nights of the soul/ego processes, to force us through or we wouldn’t go all the way…

It’s ULTRA POWERFUL and the most EPIC journey one can take, which is actually our BIGGEST PURPOSE and ROLE as humans. Everyone searching for their true purpose and this is the biggest one, after this a bunch of more consciously aligned roles and purposes come forward being to guide others through their journeys and build support systems and many other systems from a much higher frequency beyond 4D… We all have many purposes, roles, missions and it’s how we all create a new world together.

But as I experienced and saw deeply from within, until each has released and resolved the ego matrix and it’s control and resolved and taken responsibility for ALL density one has not fully Awakened and Ascended out of the 3/4D ego illusion purposefully built from manipulation to BLOCK the full process of Ascension.

This is why I share about deeper further processes of Awakening/Ascension because none of this is shared in mainstream social media, spiritual or conscious circles, groups as deeply as I and others are sharing, those of us that share from this Higher Embodied perspective are usually pushed aside for the “fluffy” skittles and rainbows, love and light spiritual regurgitation…  as it’s a lot easier and not so serious, only scratching the very surface of it all, avoiding the deepest depths because it’s “too much”, “not enough time” or “gets in the way of regular 3D material life” missing the entire Bigger Deeper later phases of the Awakening into the Ascension journey which makes it all way more intense to experience at this point, because as I mentioned nothing can stop this Mass Collective Shift, these new Higher Frequencies are going to keep pushing deeper and deeper to force everyone through.

There’s always an easier way by just diving into it all and WANTING to get through it or we can make it really tough intense and uncomfortable for ourselves by endlessly FIGHTING it, we always have a choice.  It just depends how we want to experience it all.

I share the way I do because I’ve actually EXPERIENCED and EMBODY what I’m sharing and saw this mass awakening was coming for years now and it would take so many souls to the floor in confusion with such intensity forcing all to the next level whether they wanted to or not. Which is the phase when the massive emotions and anger take over with many thinking somethings wrong with themselves, I just wanted to share that nothings “wrong” with you, your not broken, you don’t have a “mental disorder”…. Your being gifted a powerful nudge to begin the deeper processes we we can all come HOME together, because its time to END the ILLUSION, create and build a Sacred new world from Love, Truth, Purity and ONENESS with no separation.

I know this was a deep one but felt very guided to share my process  and view of this at this very specific time for those open to more and feeling there’s much much more, because there always is and truly,

WE ARE THE CHANGE WE’VE BEEN WAITING FOR…!!

The true Ascension journey being to actually Embody the frequencies of 12D in the physical and then beyond energetically. 5D embodiment doesn’t truly start until after the ego control is fully dissolved, released and surrendered to the Higher Heart, so 5D becomes the beginning of a far more Expansive journey back HOME to FULL UNIVERSAL, SOURCE CONSCIOUSNESS, It’s so much more vast and EXPANSIVE then found out in the mainstream world or ancient texts… and the Higher journey is all coded within each of our DNA.

Staying Aligned and centred is KEY to moving through this deep and powerful process. I guide souls to get outside every morning, get your bare feet on the ground, play in the water, connect with the trees, animals, find some beautiful flowers, sing, chant, play in and water, play with the sun (Solaris) and Gaia, or anything that brings you great joy which opens the heart, make powerful intentions for yourself to see and feel and be present to when your lost in emotions looping in old 3D unconscious patterns so you can pull yourself out of it… and get into a habit of doing all this BEFORE getting into the “daily grind” and regular life… this will help soooooo much, as being Aligned is Key to seeing ourselves and being PRESENT which allows us to OBSERVE ourselves, our choices, actions, reactions, them make necessary shifts to get back on track. It’s all about shifting out of the old ways and putting our process and consciousness first, always, that’s where the real shifts happen.

WE’VE ALL GOT THIS more than we know, I know it gets intense and sometimes we fall off and get lost in it all, and that’s ok, we just pick ourselves back up with no judgment and keep on going. It’s a Roller Coaster ride as meant to be to push, pull and squeeze all the density out of us, and the more we put our process first and work through it all, the Lighter it gets….

I LOVE YOU…. SOOOOOOOO MUCH, holding DEEP RESPECT and APPRECIATION for all the hard work you all put into your journeys, it’s not easy, it’s not pretty all the time but it does have EPIC and PROFOUND EXPANDED moments to balance out all the deeper processes…🤍✨💎✨🤍